Aku ingatkan lagu baru rihanna lagu pasal mencari rezeki Tapi.. Hmm lagu pasal 'kerjekan' org agaknye kut #maksiat
Everyone else is looking forward to have an exciting future with someone or something.. But you're just.. staring into blank space
Dlm 1 minit update status/share post kat fb sampai 5 kali tak salah bro Tapi jgn lupe dlm satu hari solat kene 5 kali K bye
Ladies be like 'i dun dress for guys, i dress for myself' tapi ko tu da anak 2 pakai hotpants Laki baru baligh pun meleleh tengok kaki kau
@IslamicTweeted Mar 4 Say Alhamdulillah when you sit with your family, Because there is someone somewhere who wishing to be with his family.
Just met my first date in person. After more than 6 years later Kenangan cinta pertama First cut is the deepest Life goes on
@MeFauzi_ Mar 13 18 years old dah staycation dengan bf/gf. Aku pukul 11 bapak dah message "mane merayap?!" 😧
Bila kite menaruh harapan kat seseorang, Kite pasti akan dapat rasa kecewa
The worst kind of stubborn people are old stubborn people. Because they don't bother to change their ways while they're young
@amalinaxXx Mar 5 Just because you are more pious, doesn't mean you have the rights to say about person's success as "istidraj" or things like that in public.
The only way into her heart is through her stomach (if you can cook well). Or her funnybone
A: wah, peminat cite munafik bro? Sampai decal munafik besar2 tampal kat windshield kereta
B: tak. Nama aku kan syafik. Bini aku nama munah
If miscommunication & bad assumption are common causes of conflict, Then crystal clear communication and positivity can solve many problems
L: agaknye Tuhan sedang menguji saye hari ini
P: kenape
L: kerana kecantikan awak sangat menggoda keimanan saye
Ciah
@Jokoy Mar 2 Los Angeles, CA Picked my computer up at Genius Bar today. They said that it wasn't broken and that I was just stupid. Thanks #apple
Kimais. Kau post gambar kat ig pukul 6.30 pagi.. pukul 7 da dpt 14 likes. Ko celebrity pe
Remember back then when ig used to be
"let the picture speak for itself"
And not
*insert poems*
*insert hashtag*
*insert more hashtags*
Hmmm kalau budak bwk rxz masih p-plate ajak aku riding gi cameron highlands..
@Uselessxhope Feb 1 Tak payah melawa lebih sangat, if he wants you, he will accept all your flaws tak kisah lah kulit berjerawat ke hitam ke. Simple.
Sometimes their level of intelligence insults me
I have the best mom ever. Mana nk dpt mak mcm aku In one night she cleaned, mop, vacuum my room and my cupboard. And my shoerack too
Friday, August 12, 2016
Thursday, August 11, 2016
tweets 1 apr- 31 jun
Why do drivers disrespect cub riders? Because cubs are too small to be regarded as a motorcycle. Easily mistaken it as a bicycle. Hahaa. But underbone motorcycles are one of the most practical vehicles especially in high volume traffic. Nimble, light, cheap to own and maintain
@ustazharidrus Jun 23 Puasa tanpa solat ibarat kerja tanpa gaji.
Korg imagine officer yng badan tinggi besar mcm @EwanDez pastu muke fierce intimidating mcm hispanic skinhead. mcm cain velasquez.. .. pastu tibe2 die joget dgn nyanyi suare lembut "indahnya sungguh di hari raya Ramainya orang bersuka ria.."
@SantapanMinda Jun 17 Islam is not about 'we're better than you'. Islam is about 'let me show you something that is better for you'. #iloveislam
#life teaches me that nothing lasts forever
@ainfazlianaa Jun 6 Masa tunang adalah waktu yg paling kritikal . Kenapa??? Selangkah kau menuju ke jalan yg halal , syaitan tidak akan suka !!!
@CintaRasulAllah Jun 17 Berpuasa adalah suatu rukun dan solat juga adalah suatu rukun.
People with assets/money vs people with hardwork/talent
"finally got my 2b and bought myself a duke. i'm gonna call it lizzie" itu motor india. kasi la nama relevant. tamilselvam ke ravi ke
#Hate is more likely to transform into love, than #sympathy And that's why girls like bad boys
Ade yng amek mc pasal leave tak dpt. Korg nak dgr alasan yng bodo org amek mc? Amek mc pasal seluar dlm semua belum cuci. Haha
A: wifey. U cheating on me
B: what do u mean
A: u talking with your male colleague and he called u 'honey'
B: nama i kan Hani
A: eh lupe lak
My mum always told me it's easy to keep your room tidy. Just put back the things where you take them from
#motophotopalabuto
@ustazdondaniyal May 12
Enam Kalimat Ringan Yang Besar Pahalanya
◆ Subhanallah
◆ Alhamdulillah
◆ Allahu Akbar
◆ Laa Ilaaha Illallah
◆ Masya Allah
◆ Astaghfirullah
L: Besarnye mata you. Tutup siket, lebah masuk nanti
P: haa. Lebah? Bukan lalat
L: lebah. Pasal matanya manis seperti madu
#ciah
Aku ade rashes Mak aku sapu air daun pandan kat kulit Pastu hari khamis sapu air kunyit Pastu hari jumaat sapu tepung pulak..Pastu hari sabtu pulak sapu air limau nipis.. Hmm.. Mak aku nak ubat aku ke nak masak aku
"saya tak belikan bini saya Michael kors, terus dia menopause"
Because highly-educated youngsters doesn't necessarily have to come from volvo-driving parents with executive, directorial jobs
Never forget the people who are with you from the start. Your parents that is. Since the day you're born
That one guy who is fesbuk friends with all the girls that you want to add #mutualFriendsProblem
@FiqDrewx 26 Jul 2015
"Menyesal aku tak dengar cakap mak aku dulu."
"Apa mak kau cakap?"
"Kan aku cakap aku tak dengar. Mana la aku tau"
dan dia pun BERHUHUHU.
"honey, where are eating dinner tonight?"
i'm taking you to an american restaurant
"wow so special? i love you so much honeyy"
.. sekali gi mkn kat mcdonalds. Confirm bini die otak beng siol. Hahaha
Budak born 95' and later be like "i gonna spend 7k on dubai. Around 2 weeks gitu." kimek. Bapak kau company director bwk volvo pe? Aku bila age 21, baru ORD.. dlm bank account aku pun 3-digit aje..
Single driver enters non-driver ctr, "you should tell your engineers to create a robotic arm so i don't have to stretch myself this way."I said, God is the greatest engineer of them all, he created two legs for you so that you should step out of the car.
Captions gambar ig kau seriously takleh angkat, aku nak uninstall ig aku. Hahahahaaaa
@ustazharidrus Jun 23 Puasa tanpa solat ibarat kerja tanpa gaji.
Korg imagine officer yng badan tinggi besar mcm @EwanDez pastu muke fierce intimidating mcm hispanic skinhead. mcm cain velasquez.. .. pastu tibe2 die joget dgn nyanyi suare lembut "indahnya sungguh di hari raya Ramainya orang bersuka ria.."
@SantapanMinda Jun 17 Islam is not about 'we're better than you'. Islam is about 'let me show you something that is better for you'. #iloveislam
#life teaches me that nothing lasts forever
@ainfazlianaa Jun 6 Masa tunang adalah waktu yg paling kritikal . Kenapa??? Selangkah kau menuju ke jalan yg halal , syaitan tidak akan suka !!!
@CintaRasulAllah Jun 17 Berpuasa adalah suatu rukun dan solat juga adalah suatu rukun.
People with assets/money vs people with hardwork/talent
"finally got my 2b and bought myself a duke. i'm gonna call it lizzie" itu motor india. kasi la nama relevant. tamilselvam ke ravi ke
#Hate is more likely to transform into love, than #sympathy And that's why girls like bad boys
Ade yng amek mc pasal leave tak dpt. Korg nak dgr alasan yng bodo org amek mc? Amek mc pasal seluar dlm semua belum cuci. Haha
A: wifey. U cheating on me
B: what do u mean
A: u talking with your male colleague and he called u 'honey'
B: nama i kan Hani
A: eh lupe lak
My mum always told me it's easy to keep your room tidy. Just put back the things where you take them from
#motophotopalabuto
@ustazdondaniyal May 12
Enam Kalimat Ringan Yang Besar Pahalanya
◆ Subhanallah
◆ Alhamdulillah
◆ Allahu Akbar
◆ Laa Ilaaha Illallah
◆ Masya Allah
◆ Astaghfirullah
L: Besarnye mata you. Tutup siket, lebah masuk nanti
P: haa. Lebah? Bukan lalat
L: lebah. Pasal matanya manis seperti madu
#ciah
Aku ade rashes Mak aku sapu air daun pandan kat kulit Pastu hari khamis sapu air kunyit Pastu hari jumaat sapu tepung pulak..Pastu hari sabtu pulak sapu air limau nipis.. Hmm.. Mak aku nak ubat aku ke nak masak aku
"saya tak belikan bini saya Michael kors, terus dia menopause"
Because highly-educated youngsters doesn't necessarily have to come from volvo-driving parents with executive, directorial jobs
Never forget the people who are with you from the start. Your parents that is. Since the day you're born
That one guy who is fesbuk friends with all the girls that you want to add #mutualFriendsProblem
@FiqDrewx 26 Jul 2015
"Menyesal aku tak dengar cakap mak aku dulu."
"Apa mak kau cakap?"
"Kan aku cakap aku tak dengar. Mana la aku tau"
dan dia pun BERHUHUHU.
"honey, where are eating dinner tonight?"
i'm taking you to an american restaurant
"wow so special? i love you so much honeyy"
.. sekali gi mkn kat mcdonalds. Confirm bini die otak beng siol. Hahaha
Budak born 95' and later be like "i gonna spend 7k on dubai. Around 2 weeks gitu." kimek. Bapak kau company director bwk volvo pe? Aku bila age 21, baru ORD.. dlm bank account aku pun 3-digit aje..
Single driver enters non-driver ctr, "you should tell your engineers to create a robotic arm so i don't have to stretch myself this way."I said, God is the greatest engineer of them all, he created two legs for you so that you should step out of the car.
Captions gambar ig kau seriously takleh angkat, aku nak uninstall ig aku. Hahahahaaaa
Wednesday, August 10, 2016
tweets 1jul - 9aug
. @Alhamdhulillaah When Allah blesses you financially, don't raise your status of living, raise your status of giving. Charity is extremely important in Islam
@FakkahFuzz Aug 8 Its easier to blame an app than to admit that you have an addictive and irresponsible personality with no self control. #pokemonGofuckyrslf
"main pokemon go ke?" Tak la sial. Aku nga carik reception starhub. dah satu hari digi autoroam ni
Bersyukur dgn ape kite ade.. mata, mulut, telinga, tangan, kaki etc..
imagine kalau Tuhan jadi mcm bill air atau bill electric?
Tuhan: bulan lepas duit mata belum bayar. $40/mthly
You: ah gaji belum masuk
Tuhan: okay, besok kau buta. Bye
Just saying. Bukan nak menpermainkan agama atau ape2
I don't like the idea that people only start to like or miss me when I'm gone.
If you appreciate me, treasure me when I'm around in person
This not only apply to myself, but also your own parents!
Jgn mak bapak da dlm kain kapas, baru nak menyesal tak spent time together
@AkilahObviously Apr 15 Why debate top cereals when tbh they discontinued the best cereal in history [Oreo O's] and I'm still salty about it
How much you save is how much you earn.
Kalau gaji 1.6k
limit2 dpt save $100
Kalau gaji 2.6k
hari2 naik cab, mkn kat cafe, minum kopi hipster secawan $8
in the end pun save $100
hipster alpha males
Much better to be on twitter because there's not much couple photos compared to ig & fb #foreverAlone
@DrBilalPhilips Jul 30 Our #parents are blessings, don't delay showing them #love We don't know how long we have this blessing for. #life
kari ape yng paling hardcore? Enter Shikari #joke
kalau #RondaRousey jadi polis, kite panggil die ape?
Ronda Ronda.
#klakarTak #ohTakEh
Last friday masjid hang jebat. Khutbah by uztaz maulana muhd ferozudeen. Just now masjid at jalan ampas.. also uztaz ferozudeen! Wow! What are the odds? #mindblown
"we as guys must always lower our ego when with the ladies, because a men's ego is always far much bigger than the women's.." - work friend
@SantapanMinda Jul 26 Sejahat-jahat manusia ialah mereka yang suka mencari kesalahan dan kecelaan orang sebagaimana lalat mencari bangkai dari tempat2 yang busuk
anak ramai=nafsu kuat
gemuk=nafsu mkn kuat
panas baran=nafsu marah kuat
ptg tido=nafsu tido kuat
syafiq smb=main bola mcm world cup final 😁
@DrBilalPhilips Jul 22 Make sujood to Allah when you are happy about something. If it wasn't for Allah, you would have never achieved it.
#lunch
EAT @ HAWKER CTR
+cheap
+variety
-usually crowded
-hard to get seats
-no aircon
FAST FOOD
+aircon
+no so crowded
-expensive
@farahDeee Jul 17 Allah is always fair. Niari kita yang kene, besok lusa mungkin diorang pulak. *hugs*
L: u nga buat pe
P: i buat roti kirai
L: roti kirai ke roti jala
P: sama kan
L: ntah
P: gi tanye mak you la
10mins later..
P: mak u ckp ape
L: mak i ckp kalau da suke, pegi ajak keluar aje. Takyah whatsapp lama2 dgn prompan tu
😝
@Shilaamzah Jul 15 Maturity is not when we start speaking big things , it is when we start understanding small things ❤️
Cara2 utk mendapat janda power/baik: kene step. bila dah step, baru boleh jadi stepfather
#joke
#takKelakarPun
@FakkahFuzz Jul 15 We need to stop all #prayfor hashtags cuz its clearly an excuse for doing nothing
@itisrj Jul 14 Conspiracy Theory: @Pokemon #PokemonGo is Skynet. @Schwarzenegger help us
A dog meowing is as funny as an asian with a blonde hair. But the dog is much intelligent
"the all-in-one card. Membership card cum ezlink cum MasterCard cum atm card" mmg convenient. Tapi kalau satu card tu hilang, masalah bro
@LincolnHardo 20 Jul 2014 "We all know that one man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter" - Reuters global news editor Stephen Jukes
@Channel4News 23 Mar 2015 DYK: Lee Kuan Yew in the 1970s banned long hair; Bee Gees and Led Zeppelin cancelled gigs in Singapore due to the ban
Every boys dream is to meet a pretty girl who do boys' stuff.
@AwkwardMuslim Jul 9
Ramadan:
Eats Suhoor at 2am = Not hungry till 9pm
After Ramadan:
Eats Breakfast at 8am, Brunch at 11am, Lunch at 1pm = Starving at 4pm
@FunnyPunjabiGuy Jul 9
"Standard Chartered bank at Holland Village tightens security."
But which robber would be dumb enough to rob the same place twice?
Don't stop tweeting because facebook is full of old people and people who wanna add you but never really talked to you in person.
Amboih, manje nye korg dua? Ni lepas berak galpren cebokkan ke? #keepCalmAndTroll
Q: how do you say 'nest' in #korean
A: saranghae
Biasa:
pagi nasi 1 pinggan
ptg 1 pinggan
mlm 1 pinggan
Ramadan:
sahur 3 pinggan
buka 4 pinggan
.. itu pasal ramai org bila puase tk kurus2
Kite yng nk dekat raya, diorg pulak yng sibuk nk gi shopping kat jaybee
menyampah i.
@MutiaraHadist Jul 1 Barangsiapa ingin agar do'anya terkabul dan kesulitan-kesulitannya teratasi hendaklah dia menolong orang yang dalam kesempitan. (HR. Ahmad)
@fitrihadidotcom 15 Aug 2015
Tau apa yg perempuan takut sblum kahwin?
- dpt suami baran
- dpt suami kaki pukul
- dpt suami curang
- dpt suami pemalas
Moga dijauhkan
"Uncle got $1?"
I pat on his head and said "don't talk to strangers, correct? School got teach?"
And the little boy ran away. Hahaha
Aku bukan lokek. Kalau overseas confirm aku kasi die $1.
But I just gave him something worth more than money:
education.
#mcmPhm #haha
Well the thing is, that little nigga can quickly make $10 by asking around $1 in a day..
.. and then go buy his sweets or pokemon cards etc
@FakkahFuzz Aug 8 Its easier to blame an app than to admit that you have an addictive and irresponsible personality with no self control. #pokemonGofuckyrslf
"main pokemon go ke?" Tak la sial. Aku nga carik reception starhub. dah satu hari digi autoroam ni
Bersyukur dgn ape kite ade.. mata, mulut, telinga, tangan, kaki etc..
imagine kalau Tuhan jadi mcm bill air atau bill electric?
Tuhan: bulan lepas duit mata belum bayar. $40/mthly
You: ah gaji belum masuk
Tuhan: okay, besok kau buta. Bye
Just saying. Bukan nak menpermainkan agama atau ape2
I don't like the idea that people only start to like or miss me when I'm gone.
If you appreciate me, treasure me when I'm around in person
This not only apply to myself, but also your own parents!
Jgn mak bapak da dlm kain kapas, baru nak menyesal tak spent time together
@AkilahObviously Apr 15 Why debate top cereals when tbh they discontinued the best cereal in history [Oreo O's] and I'm still salty about it
How much you save is how much you earn.
Kalau gaji 1.6k
limit2 dpt save $100
Kalau gaji 2.6k
hari2 naik cab, mkn kat cafe, minum kopi hipster secawan $8
in the end pun save $100
hipster alpha males
Much better to be on twitter because there's not much couple photos compared to ig & fb #foreverAlone
@DrBilalPhilips Jul 30 Our #parents are blessings, don't delay showing them #love We don't know how long we have this blessing for. #life
kari ape yng paling hardcore? Enter Shikari #joke
kalau #RondaRousey jadi polis, kite panggil die ape?
Ronda Ronda.
#klakarTak #ohTakEh
Last friday masjid hang jebat. Khutbah by uztaz maulana muhd ferozudeen. Just now masjid at jalan ampas.. also uztaz ferozudeen! Wow! What are the odds? #mindblown
"we as guys must always lower our ego when with the ladies, because a men's ego is always far much bigger than the women's.." - work friend
@SantapanMinda Jul 26 Sejahat-jahat manusia ialah mereka yang suka mencari kesalahan dan kecelaan orang sebagaimana lalat mencari bangkai dari tempat2 yang busuk
anak ramai=nafsu kuat
gemuk=nafsu mkn kuat
panas baran=nafsu marah kuat
ptg tido=nafsu tido kuat
syafiq smb=main bola mcm world cup final 😁
@DrBilalPhilips Jul 22 Make sujood to Allah when you are happy about something. If it wasn't for Allah, you would have never achieved it.
#lunch
EAT @ HAWKER CTR
+cheap
+variety
-usually crowded
-hard to get seats
-no aircon
FAST FOOD
+aircon
+no so crowded
-expensive
@farahDeee Jul 17 Allah is always fair. Niari kita yang kene, besok lusa mungkin diorang pulak. *hugs*
L: u nga buat pe
P: i buat roti kirai
L: roti kirai ke roti jala
P: sama kan
L: ntah
P: gi tanye mak you la
10mins later..
P: mak u ckp ape
L: mak i ckp kalau da suke, pegi ajak keluar aje. Takyah whatsapp lama2 dgn prompan tu
😝
@Shilaamzah Jul 15 Maturity is not when we start speaking big things , it is when we start understanding small things ❤️
Cara2 utk mendapat janda power/baik: kene step. bila dah step, baru boleh jadi stepfather
#joke
#takKelakarPun
@FakkahFuzz Jul 15 We need to stop all #prayfor hashtags cuz its clearly an excuse for doing nothing
@itisrj Jul 14 Conspiracy Theory: @Pokemon #PokemonGo is Skynet. @Schwarzenegger help us
A dog meowing is as funny as an asian with a blonde hair. But the dog is much intelligent
"the all-in-one card. Membership card cum ezlink cum MasterCard cum atm card" mmg convenient. Tapi kalau satu card tu hilang, masalah bro
@LincolnHardo 20 Jul 2014 "We all know that one man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter" - Reuters global news editor Stephen Jukes
@Channel4News 23 Mar 2015 DYK: Lee Kuan Yew in the 1970s banned long hair; Bee Gees and Led Zeppelin cancelled gigs in Singapore due to the ban
Every boys dream is to meet a pretty girl who do boys' stuff.
@AwkwardMuslim Jul 9
Ramadan:
Eats Suhoor at 2am = Not hungry till 9pm
After Ramadan:
Eats Breakfast at 8am, Brunch at 11am, Lunch at 1pm = Starving at 4pm
@FunnyPunjabiGuy Jul 9
"Standard Chartered bank at Holland Village tightens security."
But which robber would be dumb enough to rob the same place twice?
Don't stop tweeting because facebook is full of old people and people who wanna add you but never really talked to you in person.
Amboih, manje nye korg dua? Ni lepas berak galpren cebokkan ke? #keepCalmAndTroll
Q: how do you say 'nest' in #korean
A: saranghae
Biasa:
pagi nasi 1 pinggan
ptg 1 pinggan
mlm 1 pinggan
Ramadan:
sahur 3 pinggan
buka 4 pinggan
.. itu pasal ramai org bila puase tk kurus2
Kite yng nk dekat raya, diorg pulak yng sibuk nk gi shopping kat jaybee
menyampah i.
@MutiaraHadist Jul 1 Barangsiapa ingin agar do'anya terkabul dan kesulitan-kesulitannya teratasi hendaklah dia menolong orang yang dalam kesempitan. (HR. Ahmad)
@fitrihadidotcom 15 Aug 2015
Tau apa yg perempuan takut sblum kahwin?
- dpt suami baran
- dpt suami kaki pukul
- dpt suami curang
- dpt suami pemalas
Moga dijauhkan
"Uncle got $1?"
I pat on his head and said "don't talk to strangers, correct? School got teach?"
And the little boy ran away. Hahaha
Aku bukan lokek. Kalau overseas confirm aku kasi die $1.
But I just gave him something worth more than money:
education.
#mcmPhm #haha
Well the thing is, that little nigga can quickly make $10 by asking around $1 in a day..
.. and then go buy his sweets or pokemon cards etc
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