Mun Lee Expenses 2026

 Scenario: Married +2 kids + Dom Helper

Income: 3400 

1. Nafkah 300
2. Manulife investment 300
3. Mum & dad 300
4. Insurance 135
5. Dom Help 550

Loans:

1. Home 380 (from CPF, done after 5 years )
2. Motor MT03 400 (done after 4 years)

1. Food  400
2. Groceries (Pampers, milk) 600
3. Private clinics and pharmacy 100
4. School Fees (Baby Bonus utilised) 468
5. Bills (SP, telco, wifi) 300

1. Mt03 Petrol (JB now and then) 60
2. Mt03 Parking (Bi-annual is 120) 20 
3. Mt03 Maintenance (approx) 50  

1. Shopee 60
2. Tribecar, Getgo, Bluesg 150
3. Cashcard/Ezlink top up 30
4. Cab taxi (seldom but varied) 10

BALANCE: - 433

Mun Lee Expenses

Scenario: Married +2 kids

Income: 3200 

1. Manulife investment 300
2. Mum & dad 300
3. Insurance 135

Loans:

1. Home 380 (from CPF, done after 5 years )
2. Motor MT03 400 (done after 4 years)

1. Food (exclude Tingkat food) 400
2. Groceries (Pampers, milk) 600
3. Private clinics and pharmacy 100
4. School Fees (Baby Bonus, Subsidy and CDA assisted is 920) 0
5. Bills 300

1. Mt03 Petrol (JB now and then) 60
2. Mt03 Parking (Bi-annual is 120) 20 
3. Mt03 Maintenance (approx) 50  

1. Shopee 60
2. Tribecar, Getgo, Bluesg 300
3. Cashcard/Ezlink top up 30
4. Cab taxi (seldom but varied) 10

BALANCE: 535

bikes i got the money but i don't hehe

 

Akhirat investment

1.  To resume my quran lessons with Ustaz Khai
• The importance of tajweed
2.  To solat tahajud; pray to faster reunite with my parents 
3.  To keep in touch with my parents at least twice a week
4.  To teach my wife; strengthen her eman
5.  To recite surah yassin at least once a week, thursday nights
6.  To increase charity distribution
7.  To strengthen ties with families, neighbours
8.  To sunnah fast every monday and thursday
9.  To sunnah qada every missing solat before going to sleep
10.   To sunnah solat dhuha
11.  To withstand nafsu (7 deadly sins)
• lust - sexual craving
• gluttony
• pride - oversharing and boast self-achievements
• sloth - procrastination etc
• wrath - control anger and emotions
• greed - excessive desire towards materialism
• envy - despise towards others' well-being

Tweets - 6 May

 

In life, there are stuffs that happens once in a lifetime or never at all. That is why I'm still Broken heart when I sold off my sv650s. The only 600/650cc v2 in a sports varient. Okay maybe once or twice. There's a hyosung/nazablade 650 hahaha

@IslamicTongue · Mar 6 Pray not only because you need something but because you have a lot to be thankful for.

When I was young, I wanted to be a social media influencer. When I became wise, I decided to uninstall social media

If I get 20 cents per word for every rant I listen from boi mengeluh.. Fuh.. Takyah ot Smiling face with open mouth and tightly-closed eyes just listen to his stupid rants

Dr: ada rasa nak bunuh diri? Husband: ada Dr: but what stops you from suicide? Husband : kalau saya bunuh diri sekarang, tak dapat la tengok liverpool angkat championship. Dah 30 tahun saye tunggu *rimshot drum sound*

@LikneshR · Mar 10 I am an indian,i dont eat beef .I went to the burger shop to buy burger he cooks beef and chicken on the same place. Did i fight because of that ? No because it is an understanding ,if everyone gets this concept...maka ciptalah perpaduan

I'm very sure when mummy first met daddy 40 years ago there's 101 things she's annoyed of about him But when daddy will no longer around be, those same 101 things are what she actually can't live without Love is actually too vast and great for us to understand

Maybe kovid is just how humanity is being repaid. Especially global warming and stuffs

It's already 2020 I'm fine with people replying whatsapp messages the speed of emails. Because I do at that same speed too Else you can give a phone call. Just press this symbol located inside your phone Right pointing backhand index Telephone receiver It's actually a useful feature to get an immediate response

Side tracking though, I still wonder what happen to one of my best friends He's the first to be invited and congratulated me. But like several weeks ago he blocked me on most platforms Thinking face 

sufiyan bloodvein @sufiyanblodvein · Mar 22 Well if he's reading this, just wanna say thank you for our adventure trip in 2014. And thank you for the t-shirt you bought me from japan Yes your nerdish comfort zone is massive Smiling face with open mouth and tightly-closed eyes but I pray that life goes well according to what you preferred. Allah have plans for us all

First time taking grab plus just now. Nicee. Car seat with arm rest. Automatic doors. Better comfort with few dollars added

Well there's a saying that if it looks too good, you begin to fear it getting stolen haha

As much as I kinda hate my former tl, I just realised he gave me three 'A-grade' ish out of seven Face with open mouth alhamdulillah Okay la, gimme SERGEANT3 for me this june laaaa

@chiefteta · Apr 18 “If you cannot believe that you can do it, then you have no chance at all” I use this at work at all the time to motivate my Team.

@neekchan · Apr 23 Replying to @malik_matin I don't think I've seen Singaporeans being so nice to Singaporeans as much as during this entire #circuitbreakersg. It's really one of the best incidental outcomes.

Iftar meme visualised in words and observation: Newly wed: homemade tapao chicken kebab with cheese and lettuce, nuggets, fruits, kurma 5yrs married: homemade jemput2 pisang, kurma 10yrs married: sandwich 7 eleven, kurma

@rahim_isam · Apr 25 21 pesanan bermakna dari  Ebit Lew. 1- “Walaupun kita miskin, tapi bila kita ada agama, kita bahagia” 2- “Kita solat bukan sebab kita baik, tapi sebab kita hamba Allah.” 3- “Siapa betulkan solat, Allah betulkan hidup dia.”

Until today I still censore my wife's face. I prefer low profile

10 'nice' things about the CB/kovid - a thread 1 - erp is suspended. As an essential worker, now and then I have to pass thru gantries via cte/aye 

2 - electricity bills rebate wah, this month electric bill i pay nothing because deducted from the rebate voucher 

3 - slight petrol price drop No jaybi petrol during this period Pensive face but oh well, ron95 is about 15 cents per litre cheaper at the moment 

4 - the mask With our facial expressions consealed, we receive lesser bullshit from (malay) colleagues. No more 'ko gile pe senyum sorang2' or 'ko nampak mcm monyok aje. Senyum la siket' Hence much less complication from judgemental people of a certain race 

5 - WFH / rotational work week Seriously. I envy you people because I'm not entitled Unamused face Despite challenging productivity, think of all the transport money and commuting and hassle you saved Also if you're on period (for the ladies) 

6 - social distanting (S.D.) Seriously. When I was in a queue at a supermarket or boarding the bus.. Irritates me when my butt is touched or the heel of my shoe is stepped on As especially when the cashier is still scanning my items, your barang2 also no SD put near mine Confused face 

7 - less traffic Okay, maybe too similar to number 1. But on a regular rush hour I would be Racing motorcycle lanesplitting a gridlock traffic with 3 bikes in front of me and 3 bikes behind me Worth mentioning. Safety and road-mental related haha 

8 - quality family time

Tweets - 1 March

 @IlmFeed · Dec 30, 2019 Thread: Here are some of our favourite stories from 2019: When a politician who once said 'Islam is a lie' became a Muslim:

Best nine tapi letak 16 gambar. Dah 2020 pun maths tak pandai2

I think sinkapo is the only place where you can be broke and overweight at the same time

Don't mean to preach but the propose of buying a -car insurance- is to prepare for an accident. You're 100% sure that in a lifetime you won't involve in an accident? Then skip buying it Same goes to your -prayers- If you're 100% sure you'll end up in heaven? Then skip it

A hobi that i might want to take up this year? Drone flying. Maybe cooking. Or start on the ukulele.

@imranye dont take it too seriously, it is just a tv show, if u do take it too seriously, it really says a lot about your trust in god.

18 Things People Think This Decade Will Be Remembered For 19. Rise of uber and phv 20. Rise of pmd 21. Rise of food delivery apps 22. Car/bicycle sharing 23. Mobile online gaming 24. Social media 'story mode' 25. Man city fans

Always considered myself as an oldskol guy. Not retro, but just outdated. Back then when kids are into mcr, fall out boy and shit. I was into iron maiden, helloween, early deftones material, rage against the machine and all It's just that new products lack depth and character

Finally watched antman2 just now.. With that i finished watching all phase 1 mcu movies. The brightest tone so far, nobody died in the story

Carik kawan rapat pun macam jodoh jugak Imagine. Reservist sama2, keje tempat sama2, dua2 naik motor, main mobile game sama app, support sama team bola sama.. So many similarities yet still. Kalau die tak nak rapat dgn kite, nak buat ape? 

sufiyan bloodvein @sufiyanblodvein · Jan 13 So many common interests yet no chemistry 

sufiyan bloodvein @sufiyanblodvein · Jan 14 On a positive note, we just have to respect another one's freedom of choice. Yes lines are drawn. But sometimes the most meaningful friendships are forged through mutual understanding despite differences

Some people have to post a pic of every single thing they buy which are quite expensive Thinking face 

sufiyan bloodvein @sufiyanblodvein · Jan 15 And imagine if this nigga actually owes you money

IG shud create a premium version: 9.99 per month, especially people who post more than 3 stories with a day hahah Make the ------------------------------ people pay for this kind of shit Smiling face with open mouth and tightly-closed eyes free basic version only entitled to 3 stories a day 

sufiyan bloodvein @sufiyanblodvein · Jan 19 *within a day

It's about the bigger picture when someone no longer appears in your life

@_nadirahp · Jan 20 White people so dramatic. This man wife had to work overtime and he was upset so he dumped the whole dinner in the garbage. Face with tears of joy why?

Washing my hands in the toilet and then my colleague entered and said START VICTORY MODE

Really envy people who still refuse to eat veggies or beansprouts Frowning face back when I was a toddler, I had my own rebel agenda too! I refuse to wear any pants. Mum would scold and chase me around the house forcing me to wear one If only I was as determinedly stubborn like you all Pensive face 

sufiyan bloodvein @sufiyanblodvein · Jan 26 Mum outsmarted me when I was 7. Like a dictator she is, mum told me 'no TV no Power Rangers until you wear your bloody pants on you shameless little boy' And of course I surrendered. Mighty morphin PR was the shit. Think of what I could have become today Pensive face 

sufiyan bloodvein @sufiyanblodvein · Jan 26 Also, at the age of 7 it was my circumcision That first few days 'Lil P' was bleeding and all. Even I got so scared what I'm seeing in between my legs, I started wearing pants ever since

Being around malay colleagues be like 'senyum la siket. Senyum tu sedekah' And moments later another colleague will say 'kau macam tak betul aje senyum sorang sorang'

Parody of spice girls - mama: Song is renamed to 'mamak'. The music video will be shot at restaurants like srisun prata at  around 1am. Showing customers eating, smiling and enjoying their supper. Appreciating mamak food whilst all the other eateries had already been closed.

Is there a special hell for people who eat kuaci irresponsibly at work

@jalalmisai68 · Feb 4 Pakcik baru balik ziarah kematian. Innalillahiwainna ilai hiroji'un. Sayu hati bila terkenang satu nasihat Buya Hamka, "..kematian lebih banyak terjadi di tempat tidur berbanding pesawat, tapi kenapa lebih ramai yang takut mati ketika menaiki pesawat berbanding di tempat tidur?"

Facial appearance tells a lot but not everything. How many times have we heard "at first I thought you're arrogant, but actually you're the nicest people I've ever met"

Cainese: shopping everything and anything, queueing, rushing to stock up the food and supplies Other brown peoples: browsing thru the best paraphernalia at the hardware store to rob them

@Zackyrif · Feb 12 It's scary to learn that everyday since the time of your birth, the angel of death will visit you and in those days, he'll ask God, "Dear god, is it his/her time?" And the answer has always been no. May god grant you a beautiful death on the day he finally says yes. Ameen.Relieved face

A: kerata masuk jaybi tak boleh pump minyak 95 eh? 97 aje kan B: tengok pump attendant die.. Ade yng tak kasi, ade yng tutup mata A: tapi kalau pump attendant die pakai Dark sunglasses macam mana nak tau mata die tutup ke tak?

Malay names corresponds to certain decade am I right When was the last time you seen an elder pakcik by the name of hafiz or farhan Or a millennial/younger by the name of dollah or jamilah or rokiah or osman. Or buang

Dizzy face 190 bucks gone Money with wings to have my suzuki coolant set replaced

@muftimenk · Feb 26 Don't speak negatively about your spouse to others; including friends & family! By doing so you’re destroying the life within your relationship. You’re inviting Satan to dwell on the negatives. Even if your spouse has done wrong, speak to him/her privately, not to a third party!

@HajiDevil · Feb 26 ITE student caught a perv, while Uni students were caught being pervs. Shows u tht education is beyond the classroom or institution.

Tweets - 31 dec 2019

Friends who know me since 2017: kau ni badan tak naik2 eh
Friends who know me since 2011:
wah yan, badan kau makin naik


@aiirifrost
·
Nov 1, 2019
Recent spats of molestation cases among teens - korang tkde hobby lain ke? Play guitar and form a band ke. Release your energy somewhere useful please. Form boyband pon ok.


Sometimes a person's obesity can determine a person's financial status



A twin under 700cc with 100hp Face screaming in fear

That's insane if you ask me. A twin duc or ktm engine needs to be around 800cc to archive that kind of power


@IslamicTongue
·
Nov 10, 2019

ALLAH will not put a burden on you which you cannot handle!!!

Kalau keje dgn lain department lain agency nak kene sombong ke?

Let's be mature guys. There's always rumours being spread about other departments killing each other. But who knows in times of need, kita akan perlukan tolong antara sama2?

Remember the tale of the Lion face and the Mouse face

Semua hobi pakai duit. Collect helmet motor, main muzik, main drone, main bowling blaa bla

Ade ke hobi yng tak pakai duit?

Nose piercings are a turn off for me

@iffgone

·

Nov 16, 2019

Someone :

Colgate is a brand

Maggie is a brand

Planta is a brand

Clorox is a brand

Pampers is a brand

Panadol is a brand

Me : 

Belikan maggie Indomie, pampers Drypers, colgate Darlie, planta Butterfly dengan clorox jenama Vanish.

Consider myself to be an empathetic person because everything is about perspective

Everybody cares about whether they got stabbed behind their back, nobody realises that someone has helped them without them knowing. #antihusnuzon

Locker West Wing, pantry East Wing, toilet central wing. Tempat wudhu pun mcm jauh dari locker takde shelter

@ashvinmenon

·

Nov 23, 2019

I legit remember asking my dad when I was young why he was eating beef.

"Oh because Malaysia imports our cows from Australia which means they're Christian cows so it's fine"

I... I believed this for longer than I'd like to admit. Face with tears of joy

'1. Recognise the unfair advantages'

When she mentions this, it can actually be applied to many things in life

Financial status, religion dedication, work skill level and etc

Most instances rely on family backgrounds or past working experience

If you think air frying food is much more healthier than deep frying.. Wait till you try to clean your air fryer Neutral face 6-7 years worth of grease

@FakkahFuzz

·

Aug 18, 2013

I'm at the age where if I see an old dude wear a T-shirt of my fav band, i get excited and then I realize that we were classmates in pri sch

4 plugs 3 bottles and the air filter cleaned. 120 bucks

For the bros who are too easily mesmerised by a girl's beauty, remember

A bicycle completely fixed with a r15 coverset is still a bicycle

"I'm at the age where if the group of MRT police see me, they greeted me 'good evening uncle/auntie' instead of screening me"

Dulu rt strict seh. Attire and bearing the tiptop, kene fall in according to number tag. Trainer pulak tekan kite rabak2 mcm recruit

Skrg.. Boleh pakai earrings la, rambut zlatan la, rambut cavani la.. Fall in pun bersepah

Lagi pandang korg2 yng taknah buat ippt 5 stations

Hot shower after riding and drenched in downpour. Best feeling so far

@aimansalim_

·

Dec 20, 2019

zombie boleh gigit manusia, lepastu jadi zombie. kenapa manusia tak gigit zombie. lepastu jadilah manusia

"nod cosmetics - ALL EYES ON YOUU"

"ejen riyan ria - JANGAN PANDANG BELAKANG"

"nene chicken - NENEK KAUUU"

First time successfully did parallel parking. In between 2 cars.

Nothing to brag though. Did it with a kecik molek blu sg car Smiling face with open mouth and tightly-closed eyes

Mak cik at the mee rebus stall charge me 80 cent for begedil

@ShaykhAzhar

·

Dec 24, 2019

It’s not haram to wish our Christian friends a merry Christmas. 

It’s not haram to wish our Jewish friends a happy Hanukkah. 

It’s a greeting, not the propagation of a belief system, so relax.

Your faith won’t dissolve, I promise you.

@vpsupercorp

·

Dec 27, 2019

Our govt: Singapore has no natural resources, we are the only resource. 

ME: okay, so why dont you invest in us? Give us free education, free healthcare, and increase our wages, 

Our govt: *cricket noises*

Tweets - 31 oct

What superpower do you wish you could have?
The ability to control any audio equipment
Ah beng nga bawak escooter bukak lagu techno kuat2. Tiba2 aku tukar jadi surah al-imran by sheikh mishary alafasy
Pastu die terpaksa stop kejap pakai songkok jubah


Favourite sad song.
Sometimes things in life crumbles like a #houseofcards But just know that you're not alone and helping hands are just around the corner.
May you find strength in your Maker and ease the pain. It's never the end but always a new beginning


@Alhamdoelilaah
Allah will never give you more than you can bear. He might let you bend, but He will never let you break. Trust Him!
"Allah does not burden a soul beyond it can bear."
[Qur'an 2:286]


Few days ago I spotted the car with a 360 camera mounted at the top.. I'm gonna be on google whahahaha


The new Saudi. Woman can now drive. Not that I'm against it


Me: jawi name written on ic, arabic username on facebook
Also me (a middle-eastern man asks for directions):


Officially watched my first naruto episode


@IlmFeed
"If you want something bad enough and you haven't prayed tahajjud, I don't believe you want it bad enough in my opinion."


@SwearingSport

Never fucking forget the time a cat ran into a glass door during a French baking show


Abeh kalau songkok tapi kat atas ade circle pentagram


@KingBach
·
Sep 27, 2019

All comedy offends someone. Name one comedian that doesn’t offend anyone. I’ll wait...


I rarely drink redbull. Why do they taste like concentrated pineapple juice



Morale always perks up when you find someone shitter than you


1. Excessively long intros
2. Like share and subscribe like share and subscribe (i need it or I'll kill myself) 
3. Please buy my merchandise! (i need your money too)
4. More obnoxious music than engine sounds


And in english football context, the last time a league champion won with four matches to spare is man united's 2012/13 season


One litre tupperware full of mac chilli sauce packets
My sis should chill on the mcdelivery/grab


In the middle-east version of the reality show The Bachelor, do they have four winners


@UstazAmirulAmin
·
Oct 7, 2019
NAK keluarga BAHAGIA?
Kita WAJIB:
-Baca Al Quran at least 1 muka surat sehari,
-Baca 1 hadis Nabi Muhammad Saw setiap hari bersama ahli keluarga,
-Baca Istighfar setiap hari at least 100 kali setiap hari,

Hubungan family akan baik,kalau hubungan dengan ALLAH dipelihara.


Took me 9 years before reaching the peak
Huge milestone ahead of me and it'll be another 9 years for me to reach this same height again?
But alhamdulillah jodoh arrives at the proper time Smiling face

Sudden flashbacks during nsf life where digit only varies between doubles and triples


As soon as I get my flooring done, I'm gonna lay all my mcycle spare parts and list them on carousell


My formerly obese 40-year old friend can now run under 6:40mins per km Face screaming in fear father of two

Meanwhile, I'm struggling to run at 8mins per km Smiling face with open mouth and cold sweat


@ianznal
·
Oct 15, 2019
Ramai cakap Twitter ni toxic. Bagi aku tak. Kalau di facebook, kita boleh tengok ramai orang share benda tak betul, dan disokong makcik makcik yang kurang membaca. Di instagram pula ramai penjilat. Kau lawa/hensem, berduyun orang jilat. Di Twitter pula, kau salah, kau mampos.


Please.. Stop calling your spouse ex-bf/gf. Cheesy cliche shit
Face vomiting
Because what if her/his other past exbf/gf commented too? Like six seven of them

Seriously I'm gonna create six seven fake accounts just comment on your stupid punk ass captions


@WhoTheFckIsAJ
·
Oct 20, 2019
'When someone tries to offend you, remember you can't control what they do but you can control your response. Save yourself & don't react.'


I never liked coffee. But I just tried OTWC hazelnut flavour.. Damn I think I gonna start drinking coffee


Pinjaman dunia, bila2 Tuhan boleh tarik balik dari kite. So be humble.


First time Ricky gervais stand up comedy

Aku mengucap


They started singing 'let it goes, let goes.. encik masagos..'

Tweets - 11 sept

Some days are bright, some days are rainy Some days you spend 7 dollars on a cup of drink with ease Some days you spend 7 dollars to feed your whole family; not by choice


Obese nerdism is closely associated with artificialism


Asian drivers are very bad at diversion driving. At a cross junction from a left filter lane they would cut 3 lanes to suddenly decide and execute a right turn.


5 figure monthly salary and every month go holiday?? Nice one haha..



In some countries they are struggling to stay alive. Me I'm struggling to fit inside pants size 33. First world problems me really is


What if yama produce a sportsbike with the mt09 engine



$114 for prism video editing premium bundle


I can take all kinds of jokes. You can joke about my appearance, my work, race related shit or lgbt whatsoever But if you joke about me being unable to support my family due to paralysis or fatality 👊 Ramai orang tau aku penyabar. Tapi kenape bodoh sangat kau ni. Jgn pijak la



So it's been proven and tested An acceptably patient person will take approximately 5-6 months before he can no longer tolerate his coworkers' shit


@IBNRAYGUNZ Jul 28 RAY GUNZ Retweeted P.H. Bennet Blade just gonna come through and recite ayatul kursi over the vampires and the film will be over.



Aku punye cara usually try to baik sangka and try not to judge based on first impression Especially kalau jumpe penjual kedai atau staff baru yang 'nampak sombong' A lot of us malays will always jump to conclusions and say 'kerek ah die ni, carik kedai lain ah' Or 'kerek ah die ni, tak tegur aku pun. Patut die tegur aku dulu'


How to transfer photos from phone to pc without Bluetooth or USB cables: 1. Log in twitter on your pc 2. Send photo to an inactive user on twitter via direct message 3. Go to twitter direct messages on your pc 4. You can now download the photo


Yes we're adults but now I know, bebual kotor ni tak bagus. Even with close friends Because what are the chances your friends tell other colleagues what you said? From a third person perspective he/she may view your joke differently. Ape lagi kau he/she is actually your enemy


Some days we're the outcast. Some days we outcast a particular person hahah life is fair


Dah agaknye punye. Budak reservist baru 2nd cycle dah ade anak hahah Tapi paling annoying budak pes c 4th cycle bawak ducati


Minorities in sg: the government is racist! Chinese and indians in mys: hold my beer Rohinya and palestinian people: hold my dead child while i dig a grave sorry, too dark?


I wonder what's His plans for fraudsters like you


Arrogant foreigners? That's actually normal but in case you sgporeans are wondering: So imagine us visiting a country the size of potong pasir smc and their officers are bossing us around Trust me, our reaction will be 'eh sial my country bigger la, who do you think you are'


Typical ah lian mummies who wear fake eyelashes and shorts shorter than my sleeping boxers in the morning 😵


Org yng lama single and so called 'anti-couple' tapi bila dah jumpe someone die hype giler 😏


Imagine eh, diorg letak makanan2 untuk offerings Tibe2 hantu diorg muncul pastu cakap "ah thanks la. Tapi kasi makanan aje? Air takde?? Nanti aku tercekik pastu mati lagi macam mane? Kasi la asam boi ais satu ke" Hashtag just kidding just for laughs


Tapi kalau hantu mati lagi sekali mcm mane tuu



It's hard to make people realise how (insert adjective here) they are, when they have an inferior sense of third-person view or empathy 😑


Once at a cross junction, a car reversed from a left-turn filter lane and then cutting sharp across 3 lanes to enter the right-turn lane Make GPS Driving a compulsory module in driving school. I've seen too many reckless, last-minute maneuvers on the road You're welcome @LTAsg


Mt15 plate fbm warm up motor lama betul macam warm up superbike 🤔 Gitu macam motor aku yng mileage 6-digit ni kalau keje pagi, mlm sebelum tido engine dah on lah


Aku rase dlm context diorg, lebih bersepah kertas2, lebih soleh/khusuk 🤔


Janggut janggut jugak, dahi gelap dahi gelap jugak. Tapi gambar ig kucengsesat like jugak 😆


Tips untuk lebatkan janggut: minum susu kambing


"abg ni pakai celak, janggut lebat mesti selalu duduk kat masjid eh?" Oh tak, abg minat band system of a down.


My riding gloves and my airpods which I thought were lost found their way back to me 😍


Done watching 2 episodes of an old series which it's name is the same as papa roach's song


Nak mkn kat pantry, takde tempat solat. Nak mkn kat crew, takde water dispenser.


Each time I see Chin Han in movies or American TV series I feel proud as a sgporean Limits of a small-islander is actually endless. Especially if you work hard Not a very known fact that our english accent is more globally marketable than a prc, hongkonger or even japanese


Username: yan busa Profile picture: riding the hayabusa Instastory (99% of the time): anak tengah makan, anak main kat playground, anak malam taknak tido, snapchat dgn anak


Username: fir marquez Profile picture: riding cbr600rr Bio: honda rider, cbr600rr 2008, gopro hero 7 black, dainese Instastory (99% of the time): dinner date kampung glam cafe, boemerang sushi, boemerang prata, boemerang milo dinosaur, boemerang samurai burger, mkn mkn mkn


@mrstingy2014
·
Sep 12, 2019
Scenario: Married +2 kids. Own 660K condo. Honda City.
Income: RM 12000
EPF: 1320
Tax: 630

Loans:
Home 2800
Car 850
Education 820

Food 2300
Children 2400
Bills 420
Petrol 320
Parking 100

SAVINGS: RM 40 Frowning face

Where do you think this couple could optimize their finances more?


@desprate__ Sep 10 More Solat is a nikmat from Allah. Selagi boleh solat kita patut bersyukur. Ada orang tak pandai solat. Ada orang tak terdetik nak solat. Ada orang tak boleh solat oleh sebab tertentu. So please, always be thankful to Allah the Almighty. No reason no excuse.

Tweets 2 may - 30 jun

In malaysia, prompan yng tak tutup aurat kene kutuk caci.

In the western, prompan yng berhijab kene kutuk caci. And even assaulted by caucasians

My point here is that an 'ustaz' is sometimes no different than a white redneck

But on the other side of the coin, this is what we call 'tough love'

Yes his remarks are crude. But it's the same when our mums nag and scold us

Like "ah takyah balik rumah lah. Sampai besok pagi takyah balik"

I hope his main intention is to instill the prevention of maksiat



Drone flying might be my next hobby hmmm




Random flashback:

I watched a drama on suria which involves a character acting as a prostitute with dreadlocks 🤔

When you have whoring at 8 and reggae gig at 9




Her: mengidam kerang

Me: let's go check out other restaurants. Kerang bahasa english ape eh

Her:




2018 in a nutshell:

super cold weather in jan 22 degrees

bird feather is a romantic gift

Kim k creates an app

R.i.p. hawking

Lesbian h&m ad

Victoria secret crazy sale

New mys garmen

Jubah wakanda

Trumpkim

the wc european winners' curse lives on

'Borat' ver2.0

The 'invisible' prank

E equals M seeeee

Mourinho sacked


Liverpool top of the table with 6pts apart from second spurs



First time driving toyota aqua hybrid. Not bad
Started with 9 bars on the fuel gauge, ended with 9 bars. Drove nearly 50km 😮 the magic of hybrids




@SemperFiArsenal
 May 9
Alexis left Arsenal to win trophies and United are the only team who aren't competing for any trophy right now.



@PatrickTimmons1
 May 9
Just spare a quick thought for the Valencia fan who travelled to England & embarrassed his club by performing a Nazi salute & making monkey noises. He was handed a lifetime ban & watched at home as his side lost again tonight, with the 7 goals all being scored by black players.




When you don't have a hobby and decided to collect wives



Why is tea without milk called tea-O but bandung without milk is called sirap



The worst thing about being second is that you're the last to know that you won't win



@ThrowbackAFC
 May 12
Congratulations to Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang who is joint Golden Boot winner with 22 goals. He is the first Arsenal player to win it since Robin van Persie in 2012.




To 'know' how to do something and to be qualified to do something are 2 different things

Eg. Anyone can 'know' how to be an officer

But a qualified officer is someone with integrity, is very much aware that by crossing a line, he may abuse his powers to his personal advantage



With the new snapchat gender swap filter i can now become my own model for my tudung business

Mira filzah? More like mira filter

No, just kidding




Whatever you observe ade pengajaran nyer



We shud feel fortunate that when we iftar we all dine like kings

Now think of the unfortunate ones




Everyone exists for a reason

Some are excellent examples of how chronic humans have evolved into




Bukan nak kecam. Time raya pakai mcm raja sehari

Tapi asyik2 nampak nga isap rokok kat carpark siang hari bulan puasa




@caesarrifa
Follow Follow @caesarrifa
Don't waste your 20's staying in one country, work hard, travel the world. Said privileged people.

Those I know who travel the world before 23, their parents work hard, not them.





@islamicthought
 Jun 7
Problems are like washing machines. They twist us, spin us, & knock us around, but in the end we always come out cleaner, brighter & better.




hashtag musfat





Director: Cut! You're fired

Me: Well you said I should improvise the conversation since there's no script

Director: This is faketaxi not tv alhijrah you dumbshit



@FaizalMalasahi
 Jun 7
Guys, I wanna share something. Amalkan baca Surah Yusuf Ayat 4 & Surah Taha Ayat 39 after solat sebanyak 3x. You akan rasa dikasihi oleh org org sekeliling you and it makes your face glow as well. InsyaAllah, I have been practising it for 3 months -





Singkapo has around 6000 people living in 1 square kilometre 😮

Single people be like '..and I'm still alone'
But if we compare with cities vs countries, mumbai has 31,000 😵
To put this into perspective, if you share your room with one of your siblings.. In Mumbai you'll be sharing your room with an additional 3 siblings

#randomfacts





30 years old right now and I hope I can finish paying for it 23 years later





Will always prefer to drive myself instead of taking the taxi

Speaking of those grumpy driver uncles that kept clicking tougue or sighing throughout the journey




Age identity crisis exists



Rezeki masing2. Aku 3rd posting baru dpt rasa jadi field, assistant TL, topsis, ops room atau pakai cass. 2nd posting baru dpt rasa access card

Yng kat land checkpt masih full-time stamper/special morning, I'm with you




No wonder islam tak suruh pakai candle




1. Ambil selfie bersama kekasih/spouse anda

2. Edit muka kekasih anda, conteng etc. sampai kelihatan macam perompak

3. Bila kekasih lihat gambar dalam keadaan marah dan tanya "HOI APA NI. PEROMPAK MANA NI"

4. Jawab "perompak hati saya"





#Syawal has got to be the hardest month to lose weight

All the high sugar intake from kuih kuih raya, f&n fanta orange, soft drinks and so on

Plus the amount of cholesterol from rendang and all you name it

Code red procedure

Code red to be announced when:
 words that are really disliked or might cause total annoyance

1. bae
2. folks
3. sumpah
4. iyah
5.

#666ThingsToDo #26

26. rooftop restaurant at mustafa centre (kebabs and curries)

#666ThingsToDo #25

25.  Cycling at ulu sembawang park connector

tweets 22 feb - 1 may

@MillsReggie Feb 22 More A mistake that makes you humble is better than an achievement

that makes you arrogant.





Random thought Ever wonder what life is if prc still choose to be under strict communist rule

like nkorea Take a look at 20 yrs ago. Our island will certainly be less crowded.

Our products will not rosak so fast. Things would be made in taiwan instead. So many possibilities





Tempat yang banyak orang gila dan orang tua yang pemalas.





Actually being born Singaporean ade byk rezekinye. Tak kat sini, kat overseas





"Be strong. You don't have to be affected by every single word that is thrown onto you"





@brucelee Feb 20 More 🐉 ‘It’s not about what happens; it’s about your reaction to

what happens that matters.’ #BruceLee





Pakcikhood in 1999 "Abg lauk dah masak"

(Me in singlet and sarong reading newspaper): oh iyee datang

Pakcikhood in 2019 "Abg lauk dah masak"

(Me in singlet and sarong watching igtv): kejap mira filza kasi tutorial mandikan anak kucing





Abeh kalau aunty jogging sambil pegang bukak payung





@topislamictwit Mar 1 More Tips nak jadi pemaaf. kena ingat. yang kita pun buat salah.

"maafkan org lain seperti mana kita nak Allah maafkan kita."





Leading by example is better than forcing down orders





@RaimiKashfi 16 Nov 2018 More Sebuah komputer kita install software yg hebat2,

tiba2 lupa nak install antivirus, tetap juga akan ada virus. Jasad kita install ilmu yg hebat2,

tiba2 lupa nak install adab, tetap juga akan hadir akhlak yg buruk. Tiada bermanfaat ilmu

yang diperoleh tanpa adab.





Burning offerings at this timing. This is basically solat sunat tahajjud in their context?





Best things about public transport: -aircon -listen to music -can close eyes and nap

-upper seats on the double decker -more sightseeing, less eyes on the road

-convenient food shops at the mrt stations -my bus stop is nearer than my carpark





Listening to mj2 Ade cite almari berhantu, ade pulak cite pasal

periuk berhantu.. 🤔 ape kate kite gabungkan, letak periuk dlm almari

Korang rase ape jadi eh. Hantu periuk fight dgn hantu dlm almari?





We have drivers under the influence of smartphone Drivers under the influence of

gps Drivers under the influence of passengers Drivers under the influence of money

because petrol is costly (illegal uturns, reversing because they missed their exit etc.)

So riders, headstrong.





What I've observed: colleagues who are in their 50s nearing 60s still working hard

because their kids are still in sec school/poly

What I've learnt: jgn kahwin lambat sangat lah ..

Not judging anyone or God's plans. But remember peh n peh wants you to work till you die





Reminder: ape yng kau ade, kdg2 orang lain tunggu berbulan-bulan atau

bertahun-tahun untuk dapatkan. So be grateful and be humble





@wafilahh Mar 30 More be thankful for the bad things in life.

they open your eyes to see the good things you weren't paying attention to before.





There are non-handicap people who boarded the bus just to alight only

one stop later which is at the bus interchange





I just find that these insurance companys are quite intrusive. They just barge in,

gives you their name card, asks for you to log into your si pi eff and to have

them all revealed.. All i just wanted to do is to collect my stupid parcel





Comparing my time to present day i feel very privileged that muslim footballers are

getting more prominent in EPL. This way i will encourage my kids to play football

passionately, and if they try to ignore solat 5 waktu i just show them a pic of mane,

salah, ozil or mustafi 😀





What if the remaining heroes come into acceptance and decided not to revenge on thanos?

Then #AvengersEndgame would just be a soap opera of every individual trying to

move on with life. I mean, didn't #Thanos also wipe off half of the villains

Just let him retire happily 😄





I wish i can whatsapp send this to every people who didn't know how to use

earphones/headphones inside the bus/mrt





@SabrItaway Apr 13 More You delay your prayers and then complain

when Allahﷻ delays answering your Du’ā’s..





Instead of burning fossil fuels, singapore electricity supply can depend on the

taik hidung from the ah pek sitting beside me in the bus. From the start of the journey

asyik korek hidung non stop





Lelaki simpan janggut ade 2 sebab aje Sebab die warak atau die nak jadi macam

band system of a down





@AnilMohanlal Follow Follow @AnilMohanlal Arguments try to decide who is right right.

Discussions try to decide what is right.





It's about time land transport authority enforce 'no nose picking allowed.

Fine $500' in mrt and buses





Minah melayu skrg pun da hi-SES. Post gambar posing dgn maserati, panigale

Post video workout kat gym (tapi background voice 'ceywah baik sial' suare minah lagi satu.

members die) pakai attire under armour premium

Tapi yng penting bf kene kaya atau mat saleh 😆 proud of y'all





Mum never raised me like a king. She's the world's greatest cook

but she only fed me what i needed, not what i wanted Through her struggles

and examplery sacrifices, her lessons shaped me into an individual with

respectful manners, impartiality and the fear of God cc: tunangku

tweets 31 nov - 1 feb

Things that i didn't have back then (but most kids do)

-tamiya
-playstation 1/2
-gameboy
-digimon
-beyblade
-bumble bee yoyo
-super soaker
-heelys

Instead i had

-audley
-windows 95/98
-brickgame
-tamagochi
-mitre epl soccerball
-watergun from tora candybox
-Styrofoam airplane


🤔 imagine ade org suruh bomoh santau. Bomoh baca2 pastu tiba2 jin die reply:

Eh ni nama ramai orang pakai la! Kat singkapo pun ade indon pun ade.. numbor paspot numbor ic ada?


@qilahrzli
 2 Dec 2018

Phone calls are replaced by WhatsApp. Feelings are now tweets. And memories are some pictures we post on Instagram.


@izzharnazri
 27 Nov 2018
More
Antara sebab rezeki sempit?

Kedekut dengan ahli keluarga.

Especially mak ayah.


Bangsa melayu harus lebih seperti bangsa cina. Mereka selalu mencintai dan mengingati ibu mereka pada setiap saat

Tidak percaya, dgr lah percakapan mereka:


ching chong chin ciao MOTHER ching chong chong MOTHER ching chai MOTHER kanina ni de ching ching MOTHER


Kenape kahwin jgn lambat sangat?

Kat tempat keje aku ade officer yang re-employment (past 55 yrs old).. masih kene keje sebab anak masih sekolah kat polytechnic..

Mmg rezeki jodoh masing2.. tapi kalau asyik nak 'single and easy' dah tua baru sedar..


Just my observation


Kalau nak murah rezeki jgn percaya kat bende2 zodiac ni semua.


Percaya kat quran lagi bagus


@CWonkasm
 8 Dec 2018
More
That awkward moment when the guy who discovered milk had to explain what he was doing to the cow.


Ganti disc brake depan $720 😱


@dibfitri
 14 Dec 2018
More
"Hidup ni bukan sentiasa senang, bukan sentisa bahagia, sebab Allah selalu nak uji kita, sebab bila dah bahagia, senang, berjaya kita lupa siapa diri kita"


Kenape facebook makin poyo eh


Do check out the new gojek website

It's called goblog


Kalau aku foreigner baru dtg sini, pastu takde certified knowledge pasal leadership atau security atau customs law tiba2 jadi inspector. Confirm korg tak respect aku. Betul tak? I was referring to an elderly colleague of mine.. he just started running a restaurant in jehbee.


Datang keje asyik lambat/amek timeoff. Keje pun siket membawang membebel byk. Gi retire skrg pun cantik


Ade orang sembur hinggus kat tissue

Ade orang satu alam semesta la tissue die. Sembur kat lantai kat tembok kat rumput kat tangga kat cermin

Hashtag pengotor


@gary302
 18 Dec 2018
More

Anyone who thinks the problems at MUFC will disappear overnight are having a laugh. The owners, the CEO and a lot of the players are cunts. I’d like to thank Mr Mourinho for winning the UEFA cup and making it a complete set of trophies.


@ReccaluvsAi
 20 Dec 2018
More
I swear most escooters have such bad taste in music and I always wonder why they have the need to share it with the rest of the world.


@FaktaAgama
 20 Dec 2018
More
Sayyidina Ali bin Abi Talib  telah berkata:

Simpan rahasiamu berdua saja:

1. Dirimu
2. Allah swt

Jagalah di dunia ini dua keredhaan:

1. Ibumu
2. Bapamu

Mohonlah bantuan ketika susah dengan dua hal:

1. Sabar
2. Solat

Jangan risau dua hal ini:

1. Rezeki

2. Ajal


"Expensive leisure toys"


All humans are not fat if we reset to 'factory settings'

But it's what we eat, how much we eat, and how much our food addiction has gradually increased over the years bla blaa

And also by our lifestyle which is influenced by technological conveniences like food panda etc
Metabolism also plays a part blaa blaa

If you notice people who live at rural kampung areas are not obese

Because their nearest McDonald's is a few hours drive.


Plus they live day-to-day on tough labour like farming, fishing etc


The alternate word for penis suggested by my parents when i was young: 

bulbul


@inche_lebah
 14 Sep 2018
More
3 malaikat yg jaga kita bila keluar rumah jika baca ni;

Bismillahi tawakkaltu a'lallahi walahaulawala quwataillah billah hila'liyil a'zim

Malaikat pertama ditugaskn oleh Allah beri petunjuk

Malaikat ke-2 ditugaskn utk cukupkn rezki


Malaikat ke-3 ditugaskn utk melindungi kita


@ZulfadhliFahmi
 20 Dec 2017
More
" Si kaya  berulang alik ke Mekah mencari redha Allah...  Sedangkan jaraknya dgn si miskin hanya di sebelah rumah... "


Kalau tak happy, bilang dgn org tu face-to-face.. kalau bebual belakang, mulut prompan pun boleh buat


Used holiday items, let's go


Before you criticize a Muslim brother for impersonating a kafr etc. Keep in mind that it's part of his job and that's how he earn a living.


Bila lupa : Astagfirullah 

Bila berjanji : InshaAllah 

Bila marah : LaailahaillAllah 

Bila terkejut : MasyaAllah 

Bila rindu: Ku sebut namamu


Only after 3 yrs
in the eye-see-eh: my first 🏍️
5 yrs: my first promotion
6 yrs: my 2nd posting

7 yrs: my first >200cc 🏍️

8 yrs: my first engagement

my first appointment as field/dtl


'I tak mkn sayur k' starter pack


Seems like everyone is into FB 'fortunetelling' thingy kind of shit


@QusyairiH
 28 Dec 2018
More
KFC is expensive? Stop eating KFC.
Car is expensive? Use public transportation.
Starbucks is overpriced? Try nescafe.

The problem with our society now is instead of working hard to be able to afford stuffs, we prefer to force corporations to match our laziness


Gtx1050 vs gtx1060.. rated 30% better performance on 1060..


.. price difference $500-700 😮
Gtx960 vs gtx1050.. rated 3% better on 1050.. meh so tiny difference


Within 8 years i've never bought a new pc/lappy but i've changed my bike 4 times


Aku heran org2 ni kesah pasal american politics and trump.. like they really affect us directly 🤔


2018: the year when 'rainbows' is considered a color symbol of gay


Yesterday i saw this post which sounded like


'pilih lah pasangan yng berpegang pada ugama. Sebab kalau dia sanggup tinggalkan ugama, dia pasti sanggup tinggalkan kau'


Here the malaysian bikes are louder than harley davidson

Cc: tp and lta


Actually nak menang epl senang je

38 games total

10 games lawan dgn top 5, kalah takpe. Pakai subs/ youngsters

Yng remaining 28 games mati2 kene menang. Not even a draw.

Hence,

W  D L   pts

28 0 10 84
United and leicester managed to win the league with less than 84 points in the 2010/11 and 2015/16 season.


Karipap sayur, tahu goreng.

Cc: orang yng tak pandai makan taugeh


You do realize in ig, people have a certain way of gaining huge amounts of followers

Like, today you randomly follow 10 people.. maybe 3 will follow you back

Within a month 3*30 = 90 new followers

Then you unfollow all 90 of them

Ini semua strategy 🙄

And these people usually aren't celebrities. They're just addicted to likes that gives them a sense of popularity

Some of these people are selling and promoting their products


After watching kanye west 'i love it' music video, i feel like making a parody

Wear the roblox outfit and then sing "you're such a naughty minah 🎶


@ACommonFemaIe
 Jan 19
More
straight line:
______________________________________

dashed line:
___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___

someone’s insta story at a party:
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -


Worst deployment in jp still better than the best deployment in wc

Unless you're anak ikan emas in wc then I believe your level of 'best' is far different from mine 😆


How to deal with idiot jaywalkers: clutch in, 10k rpm


Semua org ada kesalahan sendiri

Sama ada orang lain nampak ke tak
(Hanya Tuhan yng sembunyi keaiban kita)

Sama ada sendiri mengaku ke tak
(Hanya Tuhan yng berikan kita hikmah untuk gerakkan hati kita)


Keje paling susah keje police band. Sebab very note salah kene buat report

tweets 1 oct - 30 nov

I think the most important aspect about love is sacrifice They say love is a losing game But in the end the reward is jannah for you both


@smrtsg 2 Sep 2018 More When I was younger, I used to sneak out of home to go to parties. Now I sneak out of parties to go home.


Bawak powerbank nak change hp, ... .. powerbank lupe nak charge hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaku ingin seribu tahun lagi bersamamu


Type yng suke travel tapi not on foot


There will always be friends who think the world only revolves around them Self-obsessed social media addicts with their selfies


Ramai yng kencing lupa flush Ramai juga yng kencing tapi lupa lock cubicle


One thing about malays is that they are so quick to judge based on first impression and third-party rumours


Kenape kite belum jodoh? Sebab kite tak tau jaga diri sendiri, macam mana kite nak jaga anak orang? Just my opinion Bukan riak bros..


@FoootballPlanet 24 Sep 2018 More N’Golo Kante’s rise is amazing. 2012: Playing in Ligue 2 2013: Playing in Ligue 1 2015: Moves to the Premier League 2016: Wins the League & reaches a Euro's Final. 2017: Wins the League again 2018: Wins the FA Cup, World Cup and named in FIFPRO World XI.


Hais i miss my suzuki. This honda too relaxed la the riding style. More suitable for ages 40 & above Sport🏍️ can build up core muscle


A lot will ask 'why so happy' 'why so sad' Just for the sake of opening their mouth And not really concerned about your real well-being


I'm one of those individuals who eats at secret recipe and then asks the waiter "so tell me, what's your secret recipe"


Orang yang nampak alim tak semestinya 100% cara die betul and terbaik Sebab die pun manusia


When you thought venom became your parasite and talking in your mind But then you realized it's shakila base calling out your name


One more time if i encounter a jaywalker slowly jaywalking with his/her eyes totally on the phone, I'm gonna stop one side Snatch his/her phone from his/her hands and fcuking smash it to the ground


Orang2 yang suke bukak vitec kat carpark macam taufiq


#notallmalays drink alcohol, they drink bubble tea too because they like to bubble


Day 5 of my night dieting which involves only drinking after sunset I also call it 'reverse fasting' because i didn't eat anything from maghrib till fajr


The meaning of life Life is always about perspective There's 3 dimensions and 6 sides to a cube Some ignorant people only see it as a single-dimensional square Don't be like them. Haha


Speaking about work politics.. some people don't like transferring out because they already besar kepala in that current position They know they'll have to go back to square one and no longer the 'anak emas' or the 'abang long'


People in sv650 fb group say the 270crossplane of the mt07 is more exciting than an actual v-twin


@trellymick 18 Oct 2018 More If you died tonight, your employer would have a job advert to fill your role by the end of the month. But your friends and family would miss you forever. Don’t get so busy on making a living that you forget to work on making a life


The difference between riding and driving is that in a moderate 🚗 accident, you lose a few thousand dollars But in a moderate 🏍️ accident, you lose a few limbs


Islam always give simple solutions to everything, but it's the people who makes it complicated and sour


@esplayn 12 Nov 2018 More West Ham now have Nasri, Wilshere and Fabianski. All they need now is Fabregas and Koscielny and they’d beat Barca 2-1.


'My wife is my ex-gf' references is so annoying


Orang macam zaki bagus la. Selalu happy. Cheerful. Everyday gongxifachai


Aku notice kedai motor ade new & old skol

New skol:
-nama English (ultima motorsports, revo motoring etc)
-cashier/clerk youngster
-receipt printed, microsoft excel
Old skol:
-nama lejen (kang kang motors, chin chow enterprise, pang keng cycles etc)
-cashier/clerk auntie tua, cermin mata degree tinggi nak mampos
-receipt tulisan doctor, color putih color biru, buku 555


I really wish i could sell my honda to someone who's really enthusiastic and interested about its engine characteristic Not just some random dude who just wanna upgrade from class 2a and get his hands on the cheapest class 2 possible thinking that this nc is faster than a 600


Korang imagine makan seafood, order cereal prawn. Cereal die pakai honey star


Marriage course taught me not share too much about your spouse:
Today
👩 suami aku sado
👧 oh iye ke

Tmr
👩 aku bingit asyik gado dgn suami
👧 cerai sudah

Eventually
👩 kami berpisah.. sigh
👧 I'm sorry for you sis (hahaha yes! finally aku boleh dpt laki sado idaman mcm die)

tweets 4 jul - 31 aug

Honestly speaking I'm more excited about getting a new Sony action cam than about going to Europe for a holiday


Lebih baik show-off motor daripada gf, sebab gf belum halal. Lagipun couples yng mature usually prefer low-profile


Khaled Beydoun ‏ Verified account @KhaledBeydoun Jul 16 More Dear France, Congratulations on winning the #WorldCup. 80% of your team is African, cut out the racism and xenophobia. 50% of your team are Muslims, cut out the Islamophobia. Africans and Muslims delivered you a second World Cup, now deliver them justice.


@vikarworld Jul 16 More My Amma: See he's only 19 and he won the world cup Me: Because his parents let him pursue what he wants at a young age. My Amma went silent mode after that.


Like i said before Everyone has a broken story. They only post what other people want to think of them especially 'beauty', 'rich' or 'fame'
Not that i want to condemn others, but remember sometimes you can't totally trust based on first impressions


Kenape bapok suke lepak town? Sebab kalau lepak residential mall, kene tangkap dgn mak


Abeh kalau pakcik bebual dgn aku pastu sambil garuk *TOOT* for nearly 2 minutes


Abeh kalau goat buat van blocker boleh upload video vines Aku rase kat sini aku boleh upload one entire season cite off their rockers


Iklan Maggi ni tak real langsung. Asyik family kaya dapur mewah mak masak maggi lepastu anak "yay maggi" Patutnya iklan dkt dapur buruk flat lama suami be like "taktahu nak mkn apa malam ni, dompet nipis gaji lambat lagi" then isteri be like "abang jgn la risau, Maggi kan ada"


@ImranAjmain Jul 30 More Bila kita dipesan “buat kerja biar ikhlas”, that means to do it properly & wholeheartedly, without complains, without sighing, without tunjuk muka moody muncung tak terima disuruh2 Kita dijanji pahala bila bantu orang, apa lagi kalau kita bayar utk buat sesuatu. Do your best!


@SajaSembang Aug 2 More 8 sebab Allah hantar sakit;
1. Dia tahu kita kuat
2. Dia rindukan kita
3. Kita terlalu leka dgn dunia
4. Nak hapuskan dosa kita
5. Jadikan kita hamba bersyukur
6. Sudah tibanya bertaubat
7. Ingatkan kita ttg kematian
8. Nak tunjuk siapa yg setia disisi waktu kita sakit
Sebarkan


A more wallet-friendly garmen can make us all more patriotic


Kdg2 aku nak nasihat member aku ni.. tapi die masih tak matured.. perangai childish.. bila agaknye die akan ade sense of responsibility Cara kau terima nasihat mcm budak2. Dari sec school perangai tak berubah. Asalkan kau bahagia la


Belum kawin/tunang tapi jari manis pakai cincin mahal 🤔 ibarat aku ckp "oh, motor ni strictly aku bwk untuk ubereats" sambil duduk atas r1m


Belum kawin/tunang tapi jari manis pakai cincin mahal 🤔 ibarat aku ckp "oh, motor ni aku buat trackday la sia" sambil duduk atas tricity125


I'm sad when I couldn't ride my suzuki for the kukup trip.. was about to make it as a farewell trip before scrapping


"How a man treats his 🏍️ is how a man will treat his lady" I'm the 13th owner of my suzuki. This prostitute better be grateful as my lady 😂


Correction bro, how a man treats his own mother, is how a man will treat his future mother of his child 😌


Daripada baca quotes macam gini, lebih baik baca hadith riwayat dan kisah2 Rasulullah dan isteri Baginda. Just saying


I think i gonna start a small shop selling used travelling goods. Since most people seldom travel. Entrepreneur. #AvrilLavigneFrankLeboeuf


Belgium and switzerland is basically like singapore. It's a mix of multi-languages spoken by the regionals. Some don't know


My single friend said 'marriage doesn't solve any problems' In my opinion.. at least through marriage, you know someone is always by your side as you go solving them


Well for the past 7 days I've been sleeping from 5am to 11am That's 11pm to 5am in european timing

tweet 1 jun - 3 jul

@MaisarahMahmud May 23
I have so much respect for mothers. Balik kerja penat still boleh masak utk berbuka & they are the first one to wake up for sahur. May Allah grant them the highest place in Jannah


Maybe it's about time i sell one of my bikes and get myself a new laptop


You either die a hero or live long enough to become a villain


@swagsterzsk Jun 5
matin Retweeted
i dont see the reason to kutok these kids . i mean like come on .
dosa ? dorang tanggung
ada anak ? dorang tanggung
masok neraka ? dorang tanggung
hotel ? trivago


@asonofapeach Jun 18
Dalam banyak-banyak nasi, nasi apa yang paling susah ditelan?
Nasihat.
(such a simple and yet piercingly true teka-teki)


Ade bagus nye bwk motor tinggi mcm nc. Can look further ahead of traffic for road hazards, because your eye level is higher than some cars


Dulu profile picture pakai tudung, skrg profile picture pakai short dress nampak lulut 🤔 Who am i to judge


@monkeys_united
Jun 24
Some people are just lazy fucks that they’re too lazy to go down the stairs even though it’s only 1 floor down. I understand if they have any health problems or they’re old, but these are healthy individuals


I intend to sell my nc next year at 9.7k


Excited betul nak gi honeymoon? Ni nak kahwin tau. Bukan nak gi holiday. Kau da calculate ke duit catering, dj, kompang, transport bla blaa
Bukan ape.. bende2 kene plan betul2.. dun focus on that one particular secondary objective
Fyi mak bapak aku back then orang2 susah.. they only honeymoon 2 years after their marriage


@topislamictwit
Jun 26

Did u know?

SUBUH
Increase the Beauty

ZUHUR
Increase the Income

ASR
Improve ur Health

MAGHRIB
Release ur Tension

ISYA'
Peaceful Sleep


I overshot my mobile data by 6gb 😵 Next month bill boomz habisss Ni gara2 world cup streaming


@auzaieismail
Jul 3
Janganlah takut utk berkahwin hanya kerana masalah rumah tangga yg makin banyak. Suami bermasalah, isteri buat masalah.

Sama macam driving, hampir setiap minit ada accident, tapi takkan sebab itu kita taknak drive.

Yang penting, persediaan. Kalau jadi juga, hadapi dengan tabah.

tweets 1 mar - 31 may

@aidaazlin_ Mar 3 Sometimes when we are not looking for what we want, we find what we need.


Sometimes I annoy you because your reaction is so adorable and I'm very happy to have such an adorable person like you


I may be a rider but I seriously don't get it when people collect arai helmets


Now i know how amran feel He has an old mercedes Aircon die pernah rosak, power steering rosak, pintu takleh lock etc.. But die punye maintenance usually thousand plus hahah So i guess it's not so bad for my 1999 suzuki

Aku rase org paling mulia Org yng rajin nak belajar & org tak lokek ilmu


Finally downloading steam because my gf told me to #gamerGirls 😍 #pleaseMarryMe #tunangThisYearPlease


"If i were a boy 🎶" Tak, skrg kau tu ape


The more cylinders you have and the bigger your engine capacity, the shitter the fuel consumption is The reason why people downgrade


@LawakkHambar Mar 14
Kelebihan dpt pasangan yg banyak cakap :1. Dlm kereta, tak perlu buka radio2. Kau tak perlu tanya, semua benda dia cerita3. Tak bosan sebab semua benda kau akan tahu4. Kalau dia tiba-tiba diam, maknanya dia lapar or tgh marah so senanglah kau nak tahu


My definition of 'date' is simply going out with a person of the opposite gender; i don't hold their hands or hug them because of respect And no kisses. Yes, there'll be a few that agree to pillion on my bike, other than that I respect their decision. I don't really consider myself pious but my parents are. I'm just living on how they brought me up. Anyways these are all past stories


Amran Fans‏ @_AmranFans Mar 18
Kenapa kena ikut budaya barat?Orang kita jemput ramai-ramai sebab nk mengeratkan silaturahim, nk jiran-jiran, sedara mara semua tahu bahawa si anak tu dah berkahwin.Baru lah tak mendatangkan fitnah kalau ada yg ternampak pasangan tu keluar masuk hotel.


@squidslippers Mar 19 
hey middle-aged people......you might find this hard to believe, but if a store closes at 6:00, that means you should be ~leaving~ the store at 6:00, not entering the store at 6:00. it's weird, i know. and difficult to understand. but you can do it. i believe in you.


"Hok aloh, hadioh mok bek kahteh sepadeh" A makcik from kedah receiving kate spade bag from her generous son as a present


Reasons to avoid liter bikes - crappy fuel consumption - tires go bald faster - speed cameras everywhere - degree burns on thighs and legs


"Diorg nk ckp ape, ckp la. Itu kan mulut diorg. Hak diorg."


@smrtsg Mar 26
When I was younger, I always felt like I was a man trapped in a woman's body. Then I was born.


Don’t blame a clown for acting like a clown 🤡, blame yourself for going to the circus


Sometimes your partner is not someone you understand but someone you want to coexist until the end of time


@NagarajRaj_Raj Mar 30
Habis degree umur 28 masih satu kejayaan. Kahwin 1st umur 35 masih satu kejayaan. Beli rumah pertama umur 38 pon masih satu kejayaan. "Follow your own pace. The moon and the sun are different But then they still shine when the time is right."


 @Alia_Afina Mar 29
Jangan seronok sangat sebarkan aib orang lain. Kita masing2 ada aib.. Allah tutup aib kita, but once Allah buka.


@louisliaw Mar 31
Malay girls should date Chinese boys because they won’t say anything about you wearing the hijab or not, solat or not, but will still know you guys gotta eat at halal places.


@SyafaatNasir Apr 1
Kita sebagai lelaki rileks je tengok perempuan berebut beli Victoria Secret ni. Jangan kutuk. Lelaki masa nak beli tiket final bola pon berebut macam orang hilang akal juga.


@indianavatara Apr 23
Be with someone that handles conflict with maturity. Keep in mind, it’s you and him vs the problem, not you vs him. Learn to communicate and find a solution together.


"Sometimes life was like smoking in silence.." 
Makcik, gi asapkan dapur lagi bagus dari asapkan rokok. Laki cik pun da lapar


@NoAmmaPessimist Apr 3
The grass is greener on the other side, because it’s being watered well while you rather watch others’ grass than to water your own.


Sometimes choosing her/him is like choosing between a rvf400 or a cb400x when you finally passed your class 2a


Silence, humble and kindness. These are always the 3 things people mistake as weakness.


@smrtsg Apr 14
Time is a construct of man, a means of adding value and structure to a chaotic universe, it serves no real purpose, it's endless and infinite, unfathomable and subjective''You're still fucking late' replied my boss.


@harara_ahmed Apr 12
To my dead brothers in Syria, to my crying mothers in Afghanistan, to my screaming sisters in Iraq, to my burned and hanged people in Burma, to my crying children in Palestine and to the forgotten people in Somalia, May Allah grant you justice and Jannah ... Ameen


@muftimenk
Don't be foolish and expose every blessing of your life to everyone and think that they’ll be happy for you. Some will, but many won’t. The evil eye is real. Learn to keep things private and not to share too much with those who could possibly harm you.


Jalan menuju ke neraka selalunye paling senang, jalan menuju ke syurga selalunye yng paling susah


@smrtsg Apr 18 
People say gambling ruins lives but it's brought our family closer. We had to move to a 1 bedroom flat


"Life is complicated But death is simple" One of the reasons people choose suicide

Respect teachers. Not only their quantity of workload is high, so is their level of responsibility for their students.

If you've been in a situation where you wish you can take back your words You'll talk less A situation where you regret but it's too late 

Even though you point out every weaknesses that I have you keep comparing me with other guys you didn't get me anything for my birthday I still love you and I forgive you because that's just your little habit And I know you'll mature into a woman who will appreciate me For who I am For the food that I'll bring to the table For the little things that we have and cherish that money can't buy I love you

@HCall96 Apr 18
Amalan berdiam diri juga termasuk antara amalan yang baik.Apabila banyak bercakap, banyak juga kesalahan yang di ucapkan.Lebih baik kurang bercakap dan banyakkan berdiam diri.Nabi s.a.w juga selalu berdiam diri. 💕


@kakisembangKS Apr 16
Apa sebab nabi suruh kita berdiam masa tengah marah?Nabi taknak kita lukakan hati orang lain. Lidah orang yang tengah marah ni setajam pisau.Kalau rasa badmood, jangan lah lepaskan dekat orang lain. Jadi bersabarlah dan diamlah. Bila susah buat pahala, jangan tambah dosa. 😊


Abeh kalau colleague bulu hidung panjang pastu mcm ade caterpillar brown color hinggap kat tali hitam


Why do diluted soft drinks taste awesome after being stored in the refrigerator for more than 24 hrs?


Thruxton 2015 for S$21,000 
Or get 2 of these 2004 drz '08 spec3 '10 hayabusa '12 fz8 '14 duke390 '15 msx125


"Kalau tak naik pangkat segi keje takpe, in shaa Allah naik pangkat segi lain. Mcm dpt cucu ke, anak ke.." Random pakcik ports


Sacrificial is the purest form of love haha


Behind every successful, 'established' or 'flawless' person on social media, there's actually a broken story Just God's way of being fair


@zakimits May 15
Jika kau lewatkan solat,Allah akan lewatkan kau dari•Kejayaan•Rezeki•Jodoh•DoaSegeralah menunaikan solat dan solatlah di awal waktu. 😇


Actually love is about the little things Like, even though my gf suare serak mcm rockers.. I think of her voice every night before sleep


@syrhaziq May 18
Too egoistic to forgive someone because they’ve made mistakes. Don’t you do mistake? Just because nobody have confront you about your mistake, doesn’t mean you’ve not done any. You ain’t perfect man. So stop being so hypocrite towards another being.


@kelakarni 14 Dec 2016
Tak nak gemuk? Ikutlah sunnah nabi "makan kalau lapar, berhenti sebelum kenyang". InsyaAllah ia membantu anda supaya tak gemuk. 👌